anxiety · bst · clocks · clocks forward · dark · depression · diary · meditation · mind · philosophy · Spring · time

of the dark, 21/3/17

….. in the dark I’m unseen… unknown… unformed…… no needs….. to be anyone nor anything nor anywhere… to know there’s nothing as much as there is to forget, nothing….. no need for etiquette, polite conversation, insincerity framed in a smile….. no need for concern no need to fit in, no need to be one of the crowd nor one of a kind…… no reading between the lines, no need to toe the line, hold the line, stand in line…. no hidden agendas nor final reminders…….. not with nor against nor on the fence, no mind to make up, no make-up to mind if it hides or enhances the flaws and blocked pores…… in the dark there’s a space as big as it’s small, as nowhere as anywhere could possibly be….. opposites crushed in an unhurried rush where I’m not underfoot and not taking up space…… in the dark I don’t have to remember to breathe, if I don’t it won’t matter as no one can see that I’m not really here as the first day of spring will diffident seep into every flaw and every blocked pore hoping that no one will notice until it’s too late to celebrate and make it the centre of unwanted attention…… meanwhile the clocks are sighing again in the knowledge that time’s running out before they’re dragged ticking and screaming into the future an hour for reasons that no one knows why anymore nor even cares as they thoughtlessly blame it for dragging or running out…….
….. mind the gap and try not to burn up on re-entry…….

© robert greig

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